My Deconversion Story (or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Think for Myself)

Deconversion - that's a big, heavy sounding word isn't it? It sounds much grander than I intend this post to be. It also brings to mind images of a Damascene anti-revelation where the unGod shows up as a totally normal non-burning bush and sucks all of the faith out of me (I make no apologies for mixing up my biblical references there). That absolutely isn't what I'm going to describe here. What I am going to tell you about is my slow journey from being a simple if slightly unorthodox Christian believer to being what I am now, a quietly atheistic non-believer. As I start writing this I have no idea how long it is going to be or how long it is going to take me to write so make yourself a nice cup of tea, this might be a long one.

OK So It's Been More Than A Week

In my last post I said I'd probably write another post after a week or so to let you know how I was doing. Sorry it's been more than a few week shut here it is. How am I getting on without the tablets? Just fine thanks. I'm managing to sleep OK although I'm dreaming a lot more but so far I've not woken up screaming or wimpering which is something I used to do. So yeah, I'm feeling a lot healthier, at least mentally speaking.

No More Chemicals

First of all I'd just like to say bloody hell, you write one blog post about introversion and your page hits go through the roof. Seriously that one post got more than twice as many views than all the rest of my posts put together. So now I know what you like. Especially Americans it seems. They apparently love a bit of the introversion. So yeah I will probably talk about that more in the future but for now here's something else...

An Introvert in an Extroverted World

For people who know me well this isn't the post you may have been expecting me to write for the last five months. For the people who know me a little bit the last five or six months of my life have been a little bit like a soap opera - this post isn't about that. For those people who don't know me at all well hello, how did you find me? Are you well? Sit down and have a cup of tea. Anyway...

I did ask permission to use this picture ages ago but I can't remember who's. If you know who drew it please let me know!

I'm coming out...no, not in that way, but as an introvert. Most people who know me personally know this to be true anyway (although I have had a few people argue with me on this point) but a lot of people who just know me a little bit either don't know or maybe just suspect. Some of you might not even know what it means - something I might help put right during this post. Have you noticed something about this first paragraph though? It's written as if this was some big announcement and as if it was almost something I was hiding. It is sort of true though. We live in a world where being quiet and thoughtful are seen as character defects, things to be ashamed of and to try and change rather than as just being a difference and maybe even a strength.